Chapter 20: My interview last night

Posted by admin on May 11th, 2010 | 1 Comment »

I had a great interview last night with a guy who runs a blog talk radio show called “Music on the Couch.”  Unlike a lot of interviews that I’ve been on, this one was a little more casual, and Vinny, the host, asked me some very interesting questions which got me thinking about some very interesting things.  The one question that he asked me that really stood out was about narcissism.  He had read an old post from this blog where I was talking about how I needed to give up my ego in order to give a good performance.  His questions was something like “don’t you need an ego and a sense of ‘me’ ‘me’ ‘me’ in order to get up onstage in the first place?”

It was a great question because I think it’s something that every artist needs to ask themselves.  At some point in every artists life, I actually remember the exact moment in mine, we had to have made a decision that went something like “I could do that.“  In other words, we looked at our idols, whoever they were and said to ourselves that we too, could be like them.  This is a statement that takes a tremendous amount of courage, or “me”-ness to it.

What I said last night was that that ego can only get us so far, or at least in my experience, has only gotten me so far.  It has helped me practice, use my will to get myself to a professional level and helped establish my sense of self as an artist that is destined for success and continued success.  However, as soon as I step onstage, that ego becomes a problem because once onstage, it’s no longer about me anymore.  It’s about something bigger than me.  Its about both the audience, and then something even greater than the audience. Some call it God, but whatever it is, it’s bigger than my tiny ego.  I want to disappear onstage and allow a greater creative force to live through me and I want to connect that greater force with the audience.  I want to be a vessel, a channel for something greater to move both me and the audience together in celebration.  This is the death of narcissism that I’m talking about.  In my experience, this can only happen in a humble place.

Chapter 16: A Change of Approach?

Posted by admin on April 23rd, 2010 | 1 Comment »

My very close friend Itay gave me some feedback about this blog and real time story.  This is what he said: “I read chapter one and to be completely honest I was looking to get more of you and I got a manual. I want to hear more about your feelings, fears, thoughts, and challenges and how you overcome them. I want to hear how you evolve. When you complete the journey, you can write a manual.”  Of course my quick reaction was to defend myself and tell him that he only read the first chapter and I already WAS doing that.  This is what he said: “I’d market it as a journal not a manual, I’d also void 1. 2. or any structure that makes it look like a manual. I think you analyze and explain too much. As an example in your paragraph about the reasons you were nervous (Chapter 3). You also mention there that “It was my first gig with my new friend Arthur, a truly remarkable bassist and music business veteran” – I want to hear more about his this guy and how you met and why you chose each other and what is your commitment to each other rather. I care less about why you were nervous.”

SO, I have thought about what he said I realize that I’ve been keeping the “ends” to much in my mind while trying to write about the “means” as they are happening.  In trying to position myself as an authority, I have neglected to truly share myself and how deep and profound this process is for me of truly going for my dreams, taking all the neccesary steps and believing in myself 100%.  This will now function as a real time “journal” of how I am making it, day by day in this business and how I am working towards my vision of being a world-renown artist.

Here is what is up for me right now:  I just added two back up singers to our “act.”  The first is my amazingly talented girlfriend Sally Swallow and the other, my friend and the equally amazing Keesha Gumbs.  We have been re-arranging some of my songs with background harmonies and let me tell you, it sounds fucking amazing.  I know that I am more in love with my music than anybody, but seriously…fucking amazing.

Arthur, Dan and I had an electric trio gig at a German drinking hole in Queens called the Wunderbar.  I wasn’t expecting too much in terms of the gig, just a good opportunity to practice and have a good time and it was our most fun show yet.  There were a number of college students in the bar and both Dan and I were nervous that they wouldn’t dig the music, but they got SO down…dancing, singing along to the cover songs we played.  It made me very excited and pretty much reinforced all the things that we have been working on in terms of making our music funky and accessable to a younger audience.

I’m a very happy man today and beyond pumped for our first NYC show as a full band.  We are going to dress up it up!

-Zach