Chapter 20: My interview last night

Posted by admin on May 11th, 2010 | No Comments »

I had a great interview last night with a guy who runs a blog talk radio show called “Music on the Couch.”  Unlike a lot of interviews that I’ve been on, this one was a little more casual, and Vinny, the host, asked me some very interesting questions which got me thinking about some very interesting things.  The one question that he asked me that really stood out was about narcissism.  He had read an old post from this blog where I was talking about how I needed to give up my ego in order to give a good performance.  His questions was something like “don’t you need an ego and a sense of ‘me’ ‘me’ ‘me’ in order to get up onstage in the first place?”

It was a great question because I think it’s something that every artist needs to ask themselves.  At some point in every artists life, I actually remember the exact moment in mine, we had to have made a decision that went something like “I could do that.“  In other words, we looked at our idols, whoever they were and said to ourselves that we too, could be like them.  This is a statement that takes a tremendous amount of courage, or “me”-ness to it.

What I said last night was that that ego can only get us so far, or at least in my experience, has only gotten me so far.  It has helped me practice, use my will to get myself to a professional level and helped establish my sense of self as an artist that is destined for success and continued success.  However, as soon as I step onstage, that ego becomes a problem because once onstage, it’s no longer about me anymore.  It’s about something bigger than me.  Its about both the audience, and then something even greater than the audience. Some call it God, but whatever it is, it’s bigger than my tiny ego.  I want to disappear onstage and allow a greater creative force to live through me and I want to connect that greater force with the audience.  I want to be a vessel, a channel for something greater to move both me and the audience together in celebration.  This is the death of narcissism that I’m talking about.  In my experience, this can only happen in a humble place.

Chapter 19: Rocking My Radical Plan and Being Nicer to Myself

Posted by admin on May 7th, 2010 | No Comments »

First off, I will say that I am ROCKING my radical plan.

A couple parts of my plan were to book myself at five more venues, get featured on 3 more interview or blog talk radio shows, and to write a brilliant business plan.  Well I will just tell you that I booked us another 10 shows, got featured on 3 radio shows and am in the middle of finishing a yes, brilliant business plan.  I am happy, rocking and in love with my life, music and business.

On another note, during rehearsal today Sally, Keesha and I were looking at the rough draft of a new promo video that we shot at our last gig.  Its the rough draft so a lot of it is apt to change even though it’s already solid, and I was being mean to myself…making comments about how I might look or sound like a tool when I was being interviewed etc.  Keesha said something of the sort like “wow Zach, you are really going to town on yourself,” a little taken aback by how harsh of a critic I was being.

Why was I being like this?  Because I think I’ve realized that it’s easier to and SAFER to think poorly or self-depricate rather than take the risk and own who I really am or what I am standing for.  I am standing for putting music out there that helps heal peoples hearts, that moves people emotionally in the way that it sounds and feels to them.  I am writing about accessible things: love, motivation, romance etc, but the arrangement, the tone and timbre of the music is uplifting, spiritual and healing.  I was talking about this in my interview and got insecure that I might sound arrogant or self obsessed and really I was just scared of being as vulnerable as I was being, of really telling it like it is.

What I learned is that it takes an amazing amount of courage to do what I do, but even more so to OWN it…to be unapologetic, not in an arrogant way, but in a confident way, about who I am and what I stand for.

I will post the video when it’s finished.

Love

Zach